Hurt people, hurt people: How to overcome the opinions of others
This is something I wish I’d realized a lot earlier in life. Because we so often discount ourselves or think we’re inadequet because of what people do to us. We think we’re unworthy of the life that we want because other people might think that.
We will lose out on opportunities because we accept what someone else has told us.
I have two points:
One- Other people being cruel to you has little to do with who you are and everything to do with them. You do not want to be caught in the cycle of trying to please someone who doesn’t have interest in protecting someone outside of themselves.
People give what they have inside. If you have love, you can give love to someone who doesn’t deserve it, that’s grace. But if all you have is hate, it doesn’t matter how kind you are to that person, that’s what they’re gonna give.
Also remember, often times when someone is critical of you, I guarentee that they are being 10 times harder on themselves.
Don’t take these arrows personally. I know it’s hard, but if you can tell yourself, this isn’t about me, I just simply walked infront of them, this will help you
The second point is that say someone has taken up a personal vendeta towards you. This is especially hard when it’s someone you love or can’t get away from like a family member or a boss. The only time words can have an effect on you beyond, yeah, I wish they hadn’t said that is when you accept those words as truth. Don’t accept these things. They’re coming from an unreliable source. What if I listened to the spiteful coworker over my father in heaven, what he says about me, whole different story.
Notice, both of these things don’t require the other person to change. I didn’t say, communicate and they’ll come around, it’s because you can only control you, you can’t control what other people say, honestly there’s always going to be someone who doesn’t have something nice to say, we have to become bulletproof ourselves so that we don’t become bitter, held back, and just like them so the cycle continue. We can stop the cycles in our own lives.
Don’t disqualify yourself just because someone else has, that other person is not the end all be all. Who are you, who do you want to be? Define that for yourself and then live it.