Not what happens TO you, but IN you

This is always an important lesson. We are in such a high stress time in the world, more than usual. There are legitament horrible things happening to people. And I’m going to be honest, my heart has been heavy in this time. There’s so much uncertainty and there have been things that have come to light in this time that have been really painful to know. I’ve had days where I don’t want to get out of bed, go to work, or see friends. I won’t stick on this for too long, but the point I want to get at is that no matter what, life will give you bad hands. You can’t control what that other person is going to do. You can’t control your boss, your friends, your friends, your spouse, your kids. It’s liberating to know that It’s never you, that determins how that other person is going to act, and 100% of the time it’s your fault how you respond. Now, I needed reminding of this because I can get so in my head and feel so easily overwhelmed. But I can control me. I can control my own thoughts and how far they go.

I once had a mentor tell me that thoughts are like being at a bus stop. Sometimes you can’t help the fact that you have a lie come your way that sounds like, you’re not enough, or you’re too much. But you can help if you get on that bus and go for a ride. Or you can just let it pass you by.

You see, once I know that I’m the only one who can hold myself back. I’m the only one that has to live my life and knows what can make me happy. I’m the only one that can sacrifice and work hard to get me where I want to go. You see, I’m the only one who can keep me where I’m at in my spirit. I mean, you may be in a place where your job is never going to promote you, a relationship where your partner is never going to respect you, a place where your friends don’t value you, but at what point are you going to draw the line and say, I’m better off being alone and in the unknown for the chance that things will change over staying where I’m at. Because here I am miserable. I’m surrounded by people but I still feel alone. I feel like I’m wasting my life and my purpose being at this job 8 hours a day. The unknown is better than this.

I’m going to get my butt out of bed and take on this day because even though this is an uphill battle, everyone has an uphill battle in someway and I will not let myself get left behind. I will not be my own worst enemy. I will invest in myself. Because even though I have a thousand steps in front of me, I will take one so now I only have 999 left.

You can help what happens in you. You can learn, read a book, ask that friend to hang out, quit that job, meditate, work out, Some people may not like it, you may not like it, but you have to live with you, and me even though I cannot see the light in some moments, I know that I have the capasity to have joy and peace and I will not give up until I get there.

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Writer, mover, ground breaker

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Hannah Fernald

Hannah Fernald

Writer, mover, ground breaker

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